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How Will Mad Men End? An Agency Weighs In

All good things must come to an end. And this Sunday, we will say goodbye to Mad Men–the show that started around the time when some of us at Matchbox Design Group were launching into our own advertising careers.

Naturally, as we progressed with the show’s twisted story trajectories and dark character depths, we became attached to these people, their clients and their backgrounds. But after several seasons of Mad Men, the one consistency with the TV show (and with advertising, for that matter) is that everything can be deceiving–and heartbreaking. Here are our best guesses on how it will all come crashing down.

 

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Mad Men Theories

We’re not buying into the D.B Cooper theory, although it’s enticing.
We’re positive Don won’t jump out of a plane or office window, like he does in the opening credits. (Newsflash: Don lands on a couch in his opening credits jump.)
We also know that Megan isn’t Sharon Tate. Just check the show’s time frame–it doesn’t hold up.

 

Mad Men Theory #1
I’ve never watched it so I’m going to go with my default … everyone dies at the end.

 

Mad Men Theory #2
As everyone has now migrated into McCann there’s a sense of tumult and capriciousness that has awaken the characters.
  • Don had a conversation with his daughter that didn’t describe where he was going but it certainly didn’t indicate he was going back to NY anytime soon.
  • Don keeps heading further west, and I believe he’s trying to get to LA to be with Megan.
  • Peter will live happily ever after, and so will Joan.
  • Rodger will go on a drinking bender and continue with Megan’s mom.
Closing scene: Tripped-out song and dance sequence with Bertram Cooper as collective dream reminiscing on SC&P.

 

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Mad Men Theory #3
I’m pretty sure Don Draper’s dog (you know, that smart one that wears glasses and a tie) takes over the business…

#iknownothingaboutmadmen #pleasedonthurtme

 

Mad Men Theory #4

  • Pete Campbell dies horrifically. It just has to happen. Probably gets hit by a car or gets eaten by weasels or something.  Nobody really cares.
  • Joan, Peggy and a gaggle of the secretaries and the rest of the babes from Mad Men start their own women-owned agency and dominate the ad game.
  • Don turns into Father Yod from the Source Family. Part cult leader, part psychedelic musician and band leader, part vegan restaurant owner and part polygamist. He then dies in a hang-gliding accident.

 

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  • If it ends on a plane, this definitely happens:

 

 

Mad Men Theory #5
Jon Hamm’s character (Donald Drapperddson) as well as the rest of the MAD MEN decide to seek professional counseling to find out what’s at the root of their anger. After many months they find true happiness and the show is retitled to NOT SO MAD MEN. Here’s the new poster…

 

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Christina Hendricks’ character (Janey Hallways) decides to leave MAD MEN agency and starts working for Matchbox Design Group. She immediately falls for their handsome new web developer, Jeremy. They get married and have 9 kids.

 

Mad Men Theory #6
Mad Men is ending. This means I may actually have to talk to my husband when we eat dinner together.

 

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Don is going to die. I used to think in the literal sense, like he was going to walk into the ocean while in California, or just jump out the window like in the opening credits (I really appreciated the nod to that theory a few episodes ago). I have now realized that all of that would be too predicable, and as we know, Mad Men doesn’t do predicable. A current theme throughout the show is that we are never going to truly know Don Draper. We may think we know him, but then we find out his real name is Dick Whitman or he really likes to be slapped by prostitutes or he wants to marry his French-Canadian secretary. Don has thrown us nothing but curve balls for the past 8 years. Because of this, I now I believe that only the name and life of “Don Draper” is going away. The enigma and the legend will live on … and probably die of syphilis.

 

 Mad Men Theory #7
 We open on a scene of Don Draper looking out the window.
The camera pans out to reveal that Don is on an airplane.
“OMG! He’s going hijack the plane! Don is D.B. Cooper! It all makes sense!”
Not so fast.
The plane is bringing Don back to New York. Possibly to attend Betty Draper’s funeral or give Sally the money she needs to go to Spain. Don also returns to the office. He’s got one last pitch left in him, and I’ve got my money on it being Coca-Cola. There were too many Coke references in the last episode.
Could Don and Peggy create the world’s greatest ad?
Yes. Yes, they (Mc)can(n). This commercial was created by McCann-Erickson in 1970, aired in 1971.

 

 
 

Although Duck and Pete die in a LearJet plane crash on the way to Wichita, the show will end on a happy note. Don directing the “I’d Like to Buy the World a Coke” commercial.
Maybe Megan will be in it ….

 

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How do you think Mad Men will end?
Put you best guess in the comments, and we’ll find out on Sunday during the series finale of Mad Men.